The Surprising Gift of Fear: A Somatic and Psychedelic Approach to Eating Disorder Recovery
What If fear is your gateway to growth?
Today, I’m contemplating this potent quote by Pema Chödrön:
“Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth.”
Recently, I’ve been moving through a portal of fear — not fear of something external, but the fear of fear itself. This has been about confronting and being present with the physical sensations of fear running through my body.
Being afraid of fear itself can feel like a frustrating loop. Fear feeds on itself, creating a cycle that’s hard to break. Maybe you’ve felt this, too?
It’s natural to resist discomfort. Turning toward the burning, buzzing sensations we label as “fear” can feel unnatural — like going against the grain.
If you’ve ever been taught to dismiss fear or lacked role models growing up who navigated fear mindfully, this reaction is incredibly common.
Fear Is Not Wrong
It is helpful to remember that:
Feeling fear is not wrong.
You are not broken for feeling fear — or even for fearing fear.
Fear is a vital emotion in this human experience 💕 It helps us:
Decide what to move toward or avoid.
Activate survival responses (fight, flight, freeze) when danger is present.
Fear is a necessary ingredient for our survival, one of the seven core categories of emotions we all experience, alongside anger, sadness, joy, excitement, disgust, and sexual excitement.
But what happens when we experience fear outside of serious, life-threatening danger?
The Fear That Holds Our Truth Back
Sometimes, fear shows up when we’re not in danger but in a moment of expansion. Expansion invites us closer to our truth, asking us to remove the armor and defenses that have kept us small. Stepping beyond our comfort zone can feel thrilling — and terrifying. For example, you might:
Feel a desire to connect with someone but hesitate as fear tenses up your body, holding you back.
Be curious to try new food at a community gathering but feel fear stop you.
Want to speak up in a circle of friends but feel your throat tighten, constricting your voice.
In these moments, sensations like tightness, burning, paralyzing, or heaviness arise — a soupy somatic mix we label as “fear.” 😨 These feelings can be overwhelming and uncomfortable and leave us feeling out of control (especially if we didn't have appropriate role modelling).
When fear dominates in this way, we try to avoid it entirely, creating a loop where we fear fear itself.
Escaping Fear Through Disconnection
For those navigating eating disorders, disordered eating, or other mental health challenges, emotions like fear can feel too big, too much, too overwhelming.
Why? Many of us were taught to suppress or numb emotions. Perhaps you were labelled a “wimp” for expressing fear or praised for being “tough cookie.” These early experiences can lead to disconnection from authentic emotions, encouraging patterns of shame, shutting down and avoiding what arises within.
To cope with these feelings, we might turn to food or our bodies to escape — not just from fear, but from the pain of denying our inner truths by only showing "acceptable" emotions to the outside world.
Personally, I see eating disorders as expressions of unmetabolized fear responses.
The thing is, is that fear doesn’t disappear when avoided. It becomes trapped in the body, undigested, and can show up as:
Anxiety
Digestive issues
Disrupted sleep
Rigidity around food, and more
The way forward is learning to gently approach fear — to meet it with curiosity, courage, and compassion rather than avoiding, numbing out or battling.
I am sharing this theme because there is a lot of fear in the collective right now. The world is certainly at a precipice of radical disruption and change.
Almost everyone I’ve spoken to recently has expressed that they’re in some kind of transition — whether it’s related to jobs, finances, homes, health, relationships, or identity 🌓
We are individually and collectively in the midst of change. And change often brings fear.
Embracing Fear as a Gateway to Transformation
Fear is not something to eliminate. It’s something to understand, hold, and soften into.
Liminal moments — those thresholds of change and uncertainty — often bring fear. The word “liminal” comes from the Latin limen, meaning “threshold” or “doorway.” It’s the space between where you’ve been and where you’re going.
How we approach these liminal spaces determines whether we repeat old patterns out of fear — or step into transformation with grace, and become more embodied and wiser through it 👁️
Fear holds a surprising gift: it invites us into transformation and deeper embodiment.
Three Ways to Work with Fear
Rather than tightening and hardening around fear, we can be softened by its presence. By stepping through the gateway of fear, we find opportunities to feel, move, and connect with deeper truths. Here are three ways to work with the fear of fear:
1️⃣ Give Yourself Permission to Feel Fear
Fear is a natural response and can indicate that we are moving towards a more raw, naked, real version of ourselves. It’s not about removing fear but learning to walk with it.
Transitions and change feel scary because our biology craves predictability. Our brains have evolved to avoid and reduce uncertainty (it’s more energy efficient). And the change process is fundamentally uncertain.
Since we have a strong impulse to strive for stability, the unknown inherently feels uncomfortable. By understanding this about our biology, the tight hold of fear begins to loosen.
You are not weak for feeling fear — you are human 🧬 By welcoming it with curiosity, you open the door to transformation.
2️⃣ Work with the Body
Fear is a bodily experience, so moving the body helps you process and digest it.
Here are a few ways to work the sensations of fear:
Shake your hands and limbs to release stuck energy.
Rock or sway gently to a favourite, soothing song.
Walk in nature (barefoot if possible) with a friend or pet to feel grounded.
- Notice how you feel before, during and after these activities. By paying attention to how the sensations feel in your body, they become more familiar and known (see Point 1️⃣!).
It’s important to move in ways that feel within your capacity, where you can stay present to your inner experience.
Don’t be surprised if you start moving very subtly and slowly; fear needs time to come out of its shell and dethaw.
Side but important note: if you are working with fear and trauma that have been trapped in your body since early developmental years, working with it might look very different to what is described above. Working with a trauma-informed practitioner might be needed in these instances.
It goes without saying that turning towards fear requires embodied safety. You might need build a felt sense of safety in your body first before diving into it by:
Learning about nervous system regulation and how your own nervous system works.
Placing your hands on your heart or belly and breathing consciously.
Pressing your feet into the ground or wiggle your toes to anchor yourself in the present moment.
Engaging your sense — Notice what you can see, hear, or feel around you in this here-now present moment.
Placing a weighted blanket or pillow on your body or drinking a warm beverage.
These practices build a sense of safety, containment, and regulation, helping fear soften and move.
3️⃣ Reconnect with Your Why
Why do you want to shift your relationship with fear?
Do you desire deeper connection?
More love?
To live more authentically?
These goals can feel scary, but reconnecting with your intention gives you the courage to move forward, adding radiant fuel to your inner fire.
Fear is not your enemy — it’s a messenger, pulling you closer to the truth. Ask yourself:
What is my fear trying to tell me?
What is it protecting me from?
Reframing fear as an ally that's trying to protect you rather than an adversary can help it feel less overwhelming and scary.
A Personal Reflection
Having recently celebrated my 33rd birthday earlier this month, I have finally learnt to trust that fear will not swallow me. One of my core words for my birthday this year is Trust — trusting my inner experience and letting bigger energy, like fear and love, to move through me with acceptance and curiosity.
I look back to my tender 17-year-old self when I first started my journey to heal disordered eating, body mistrust and fear of feelings (especially love) and I feel so much compassion for my younger parts that have grown and transformed.
Learning about my nervous system, working somatically, and incorporating psychedelics into my life have certainly contributed to my capacity and resiliency to hold more of myself.
I still have lots to learn but now I trust that I won’t be swallowed by fear and feel empowered knowing that I have recalibrating resources in reach to support myself in wobbly moments 🌊
Here are some simple reminders that have helped me when fear surfaces:
Feel it in the body. Notice where fear arises in the body. See if you can also observe a place in your body that feels neutral. Shift your focus between these two places.
Visualize it as a wave. Fear rises and falls, just like the tides. The energy will eventually subside. Breathe.
Remind yourself you are safe. Feel your feet on the ground, take in your environment, and affirm: “Fear is a feeling. I am safe in this moment. I can feel it without being controlled by it.”
Fear is a natural response to life’s transitions and transformations. It’s not something to fix or eliminate but rather is a guide that invites us into deeper truths about ourselves.
When we learn to approach fear with curiosity and compassion — to feel it, hold it, and move with it — we open the door to resilience, growth, and evolution. We move closer to what we want and find ourselves more fulfilled. When we show up to ourselves in these ways, we inspire and give others permission to do the same.
Honouring Your Courage
Dear one, if you’ve made it this far, I want you to know: I see you, and I honour you 🙏
It takes immense courage to turn toward the challenging parts of yourself — those shadowy, uncomfortable places where fear resides. Yet, it’s in this meeting that healing, integration, and wholeness begin.
When we meet fear with compassion, it reveals its hidden gifts — courage, resilience, and authenticity.
Fear, while uncomfortable, offers us the surprising gift of transformation. It invites us to grow, to soften, and to discover truths about ourselves we might not otherwise touch. By seeing fear not as an obstacle but as a gateway, we walk the path of self-discovery with courage.
As you navigate this brave walk of transformation, remember that you don’t have to do it perfectly, and you don’t have to do it all at once. Keep going, gently, step by step.
And you don’t do it alone; remember that you are held by a force that is so powerfully benevolent beyond measure, beyond comprehension. This wider, deeper holding is what will carry you through the fear and to the other side of whatever portal of change you are navigating.
You are not alone. You are worthy of healing. You are capable.
If you need a reminder in moments of doubt, let this article be your guidepost — a small flame to light the way when fear clouds your vision.
May you carry this truth with you:
“The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage.” — Thucydides
With love and unwavering belief in your path,
Francesca Rose